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The Socio-Economic Status of Penguins

Albert, a 4-year-old schnauzer, had a doll called Beatrice. He and Beatrice would sit on the couch on Monday nights and watch Dancing With The Stars. Albert loved everything about it; the costumes, the choreography, the spray-tans, the celebrities. However, Beatrice voiced her issue with the rigid gender roles and the body negativity at every opportunity.

Albert said nothing until one night when Beatrice switched the channel to a documentary about how penguins' socio-economic status impacts the melting ice caps. Then Albert bit around Beatrice's head and shook it until her body went flying into the kitchen.

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